why did you have to leave?

When I was a kid I asked you,
Where does people go when they die...?
You showed the stars in the sky and said,
When people die they become one of stars...

Today I miss you more than ever and I want you next to me....
I know I cant have you nor can get the hug I want
Nor can I talk to you
But I miss You.... !!

Yeah.... I am not a kid to believe what you said then
But I looked up in the sky to find you...
There are millions of stars
And i cant figure out which one is you...

So I shouted to the cold air
"I Love you and I miss you so much n I want to hug you...
why did you have to leave me?
WHY??? "

....Wonder....

I wonder,wonder why I love you this so much

I still cant find how I fell for you

I just cant let go of you... Cant let go...

Even when I know you have gone....

I wonder why I cant face the reality

The reality that you have gone forever...

That you never will be mine...

But I love you so very much that I cant get over you

You used to make me smile,

Made me the happiest on Earth!

When I was down you hugged me and said

Tell me what's up honey... Tell me.....

But today... Today......

You have made me the saddest on Earth!

Yes baby I am crying- Crying over you

But you... You are gone forever

You broke me in to pieces

pieces which I cant put in together... Yes not in this life!!

And I wonder.. Wonder whether I will ever get over you!!

SMILING THROUGH THE TEARS!!!!!

I know I should not be asking
but I am asking
why is it always like this?
why me? and why always tears?

No one will ever want to answer
because, like it or not
almost all going through the same
tear is what they all have for them

the feeling inside is hard to explain
cant understand what to say
there is no end to this suffering
and feel like there is no more hope

yet I am trying, when there is no hope
and faith is also fading
still I am trying....
I am trying to smile through the tears!!!

yeah I am smiling... yet I am crying
and inside I am dying...!!!!
YET I AM SMILING..
SMILING THROUGH THE TEARS!!!!!!!!

I am Sorry.... (More than words can say)

"I am Sorry"
Wonder whether that small phase will ever
Describe what I really mean
what I say and how I feel

I am sorry for the troubles I give
I am sorry for the mistakes I made
I am sorry for the worries I brought
I am sorry for making you sad

Its so strange how one get hurt
When you try to not to hurt another one
I just cant figure out what went wrong....
I did not mean to make any one hurt

I do not know what I really should do
But I want to tell I did not mean it at all
I really did not think I will hurt
I just did not want to make you fall

I am sorry,I am sorry,I am sorry
I am sorry,I am sorry,I am sorry
I am sorry,I am sorry,I am sorry
I really am sorry, sorry, sorry and I am sorry

It was a mistake, a mistake I did not even think of
You have taken it so bad
And you are hurting me...
Hurting me...more than you could imagine....

Your eyes are red and you look blue
And I know you are hurt
I wish I could take it back
I took you for granted

I really did not mean to hurt
I love you so much
More than words can say
Thank you for everything

And please forgive me
Forgive me for my ungratefulness....

Missing someone....

when some one is not there anymore
or gone far away;
we miss them so much,
that we wish they are with us...
but sometimes you miss someone,
who is right in front of you....

missing someone is such
sometimes you miss them so badly
still they will never know!

Please forgive me I know not what I do...

I wish I get a chance
To tell the pain I feel
I wish I could be there
To feel your heart beat

Iits just a crazy dream
Which will never come true
I know that is the truth,
Which I do not want to believe....

I murmur the words of a song
I guess it says it all...

"Please forgive me I know not what I do
Please forgive me I can't stop loving you
Don't deny me this pain I'm going through
Please forgive me I need you like I do
Please believe me every word I say is true
Please forgive me I can't stop loving you"

-Chanks-

It's better to be hated for who you are than loved for what you're not!

You loved me

Loved me for who I am

And wanted me to be yours…

I was afraid

To love you back

cz I might lose you

For you are my everything

And if I lose you

I had nothing left

But I was helpless

For you are the best thing happened to me

And you were my angel

I loved you for who you are

From bottom of my heart

Loved you more than my life

But...

You said I am crazy!!!

I am mistaken!!! Misunderstood!!!

You always believed

And made me believe

“It's better to be hated for who you are than loved for what you're not"

Tell me baby tell me…….

Tell me why did you deny the truth?

Tell me why do you hate me for who I am not?

I love you and you....?
I lost my everything for loving you back
I do not regret cz I love you

What is left? just a heartache
but still...still I love you
I love you cz I love you

It sounds desperate is not it? but sometimes love is such... not all are lucky to have the one they love :) well thats the harsh truth... we have to face it... like it or not... :)

I will... Forever

Ask the river
You will know how much tears I shed
Ask the wind
You will know how many times I sighed
Ask the skies
You will know how much I mourned

The golden light of sun
Shows me the eyes I love
And each shadow the light makes
Show me your smiling face
The breeze of the wind
Brings the smiles we shared

I know you are far,so far away
I know I shall never see you
But in the sunshine, and the sky
And in the breeze...
I will feel your love

Forever...

Same yet different...!

Same place yet a different place

Same life yet different life

Same me yet a different me

Same people yet different relationships!

I sure am missing my life,

The life which was full of life

Even when things were tough

Where I had a vision

I am missing my friends

Who made me who I am today,

And did not let me down

Who showed me the way to success.

I miss you all my loving mates of SSU. thanks loads for being there for me!! Love you and miss you a lot...

Missing you so much...

So much near.... but far away
I love you more than you guess
Wish I can tell you how much I miss you
The giggles we shared... Small talks, small fights
All are like a dream
You seem to be forgotten that you have me

Can I change what we have?
Can I forget you all at once?
I wish I could
I wish the pain inside me is gone
But it’s right inside me
I love you more than you can guess
It has been like this from the beginning

But...
Day by day there is a distance
I don’t know what made you like this
Can you change like this?
I can’t believe this

It has been like this from the beginning
I love you more than you can guess
But you...
You have changed a lot
No small talks… no more giggles
You are far away....

I tried to bare it and hide it inside
But it’s too hard!!


(found this in one of my books... have written sometime back... thought should publish the original one though there are some places I feel not going in the flow :) )

The sun is going down.....

The breeze of the sea takes me to past,

To a past which I had you beside me!

I wish I could hold you tight

As I used to do…

Everyone says you are gone,

And that I should face the truth.

I wish it was just as easy as it sounds !!!

To Face The truth; truth which makes me cry…!

I looked at the dusk

The sun is drowning in the sea

The image went blurred

I felt a tear going down my cheeks

Why…?

Why do I feel like a part of me is missing?

Why do I feel I don’t know how to smile anymore?

Why do I feel that there is no life in me?

Why do I feel I am not me anymore...?

Feeling of being lost and lonely,

Can there be any other hard thing to feel?

That is what I am feeling right now,but do you know ,

That a single smile of you could vanish that at once?

Did you ever think that you will hurt someone like this,

By walking away from them as you did?

Did you ever feel, how much you mean to a person,

A person who cries every night just because you are gone?

I still feel you besides me…

You are the one who made me breath

Who gave me strength to live

Who guided me to the light when I was down

You gave me life, you made me smile

All of a sudden you took them all back!

I wish I could tell you,

How much I miss you and how much you mean to me....

I wish I could tell you everything

Just like I did before

But you are not gonna listen to me

As you did before

The tear which was falling though my cheek,

Fall in to the beach and disappeared,

Disappeared just like you did from my life

I sighed out loud....

I stared at the horizon;the sun is going down….

Things could change

I thought life is unfair
But I had hope,
Hope for a better tomorrow
Which made me live.

Hard times came (yet they will come)
I thought its only for me
So I cried why me?
Now I know its not only for me!

I learned from hardships
I gained strength to face life
I found how things could change
I saw the path of life

Difficulties come and go
We have to let them go…
Keep repenting will never give a today
Nor will it give a tomorrow

There are some people
Who will judge you of what you were
Who think you are never changing
And will never trust you

One should know
That there are things
Which not going to last forever
And everything has two sides

In life we don’t know what comes next!
We have to take this moment as it is,
And Make the best out of it.
Nothing is perfect!

When we live this life
We have to gain the good from past
And make the best out of present
To make it a better future

Things could change
Until we believe in it
We will never see
What life is all about

Why did it .....?

You came and my life was complete.
It was like a dream coming true,
I only wanted to spend my life with you
Us being together, is best thing happened to me!

I had your arms around me
But when I open my eyes
You’re gone...

Why did it have to happen?
Why did it all have to end?

My love for you will always be real
Being without you hurts like a thousand knives
You may not see the tears,
Falling from my waiting eyes

How happy I was when you were around?
You always seem to know what's on my mind,
Your'e a one of a kind.
Never I stopped laughing when you were there

All I know is true,
I only wanted to be with you.
You are the one I love
And I love you so much

For you it was nothing to leave
But my whole world clattered
You were all that kept me alive
And the one who made my life complete

My love for you just isn't right,
All I want is to see you are happy.
I don't mean to cause you pain,
I pray that you get all you wish

Still cant believe what happened
how you came and left so fast
Please let me stay here, which is far from you
And live with the joy of having glimpse of you

Just like the snowflakes,
It’s so cold within me...
Among blistering tears
I wish you all the happiness my love...

No one but only You can do it!

Well it’s been sometime I wrote something in blog… can't say I did not have time.. I had and I tried many times to pull out my thoughts in to one place and write something, in which I was a failure: so always I logged off and went in another direction :D

However I thought I should write something today.

Life has been much confusing... (Umm... rather I was confused...) There were good times as well as hard times…
Exams, assignments, which was much difficult as I caught up with a flue… (it was much more tough when people around was making a fuss about being ill and missing exams thinking you are not ill but its just your imagination but in reality you really was ill!) yet when you believe in you and know how to accept what others say life is easy.
Life was full of ups and downs as usual; had some fun times, family outings, batch trip, office work, happy times with loved ones, misunderstandings, cheating, nightmares, heartaches,sharing,baring, smiles, tears… well the list will go on...
Life is always like that,it gives you good and bad both,what differentiates is how we accept the things at different occasions. With things such as age, situation, environment etc. we see life differently.
When we were kids we thought why our parents are always asking us to study, and when we grow up we understood why they did. But as a kid our mind was not matured enough to understand that. Just like that when we were in grade Five we thought the most difficult exam was scholarship examination and when we were doing Ordinary Level we used to think there can not be any exam which is more tough.And then when doing Advanced Level, things changed and we thought it is the most complex exam and this always changed when we finish the exam and move to the next step.
When we are stuck in something, at that point what we think is that what we are doing right now is the most difficult thing. It is not only about exams, when we are having a problem too we think in the same way. We think that no one ever can understand the problem we have and we think it is the hardest thing in the world, and we are the only people who have that problem. But later when we get over it we feel that it is not as difficult as we thought at that point.(but when we are experiencing, it is the most harsh thing in life!) What I think is when we are having a problem most of the times we tend to have an unclear mind and we always think that we know better than others about our problem so sometimes do not even consider what others tell by experience.Person to person and the way the same problem occurs may differ, but ultimately most problems has the same answer and the way we find the answer will make life easy or more problematic!
Well one thing we should understand is almost everything we experience, we are not the first one who go through them, and to face the situation we should act wise, because when you are in trouble you are not in a clear state of mind where you are not taking the correct decisions always…
It says not to take any decisions when you are Angry, and no to make any promises when you are Happy. So be careful next time when you are too sad, angry or when you are too happy!

FRIDAY THE 13TH !!!

I happened to read a comment in a newspaper about school reopening in Sri Lanka today…
"What a bad day to re-open schools!! ITS FRIDAY THE 13TH !!!" The comment made me realize date today.And this made my inquisitive mind want to find out why some one put a comment like that as well. Can it be a bad day because it is Friday? Can it be bad because it is 13th?

But with work I totally forgot it and all of a sudden in the evening I happened to see an advertisement, in Yahoo home page about comments and ideas of Friday 13th and reminded me it again.But I did not have time at work to read on it.Finally when I was home I searched on it, to not to find any logical reason to call it bad.

Anyone can believe what they accept as true, but there should be a logic right? Just because some worst things happened in past on particular date can we call it will always be bad date?
I think good or bad depends on what we do not on the date or the day. Is not it? Even the worst day can be turned in to a good day if we work to make it a good day... but if we persist telling it a bad day and waste the whole, its almost certain it will be bad!!
It is all state of mind! We really do not know what happens at the next moment, so why predict? The past is gone and we can’t change it! And tomorrow is uncertain, so instead of getting the best use of present, why are we predicting?

(And now there is only few minutes left of the FRIDAY THE 13TH,It is almost the end of the day but still I did not heard anything to say it is a bad day... )

I am waiting...

Tear in my eye, it is the last thing you wanted to see
But today...? you have left a tear in my eye
I don’t have you here with me today
I cried out loud and asked why I am so unlucky?

With my memory, I evoke you
I called to the empty space, but there is no respond
Where are you? why cant you see how much I miss you?
With a tear I recall, just the memories remain!

Memories which will not fade away
Where I was happy, because of you...
Because of your love! you loved me... Cherished me…
Today..? You are not here

No one is there for me to call as I called you
No one can ever take your place either
With all my memories I look at the empty space
To find where you are…

Rain rain go away...

It started raining. Kids were overjoyed to play in rain,they started playing with paper boats. They didn't know what would happen in next few minutes. The boats they played with went upside down and drawn. the rain did not stop for few days, the river, stream which were flowing smoothly changed suddenly.. Yea there the water started coming..
Alas!! Floods, yes it started flooding; leaving many homeless and taking some lives with it. The kids who were playing with paper boats were waiting for boats to come and rescue them...

The people who did not get floods got together, collected dry rations, drinking water, cooked meals etc and went for help... yea it was the spirit!
now the floods are smoothing away... but thought of writing on it a bit to appreciate the way people helped each other,
yea, one country always.... keep it up Sri Lankans!

Give meaning to your life

Life will not give what you ask for, it will give you something and you will have to sort out what you really want…
For some time Life has been really busy. Then here it is the worst time… yes Exam time! Exam and office, it is not easy to tally all these along with your life,when someone close to your heart is not well…and when you have to come to office leaving everything behind makes it horrible.
Yea " Life is Hectic" is what comes to the head...
but….
What ever happens, there are some dreams…dreams which are to be fulfilled some how b’cz they are the only means of showing your gratefulness! Most of all which is the only thing you have left to reach the loving hearts which are far away…

Life is so strange… (yea I always say so)

There are some people who are running with no aim, yet there are some people who are running for their aim. How you devote yourself, Will give the meaning in to your life. Dreams, hopes all are around you, you have to devote yourself to make them come true, but one should always make sure they keep their values! Life should have a meaning. One can have a dream but don’t just dream, Live your dream.
Think of what you have not what you don't have. Look at the brighter side.
Keep moving … Life is there to live, not to suffer!!

It is such an amazing thing…

When awful times come
And everything is futile
And when you feel like giving in…
It will make you keep going…

It prolongs us when nothing else can…
It gives us reason to continue
And courage to move ahead
And show us the path to move on…

It puts a smile on our face
When the heart cannot manage…
It moves us to act when our
souls are confused of the direction….

Sometimes it conceals,
Sometimes it bows,
Sometimes it curls,
Sometimes does it crack…!!

Yes it is such an amazing thing…
Something fragile
Thus a mighty
Which rules ones' life

It is something to be cherished
something that will energize us in return…
It can be found in each of us,
And it can bring light into the darkest of places…

It is strange how it makes one live
While demolish another
How strange it is? Gives you life when you have,
And takes your life when you lack it!

Yes… It is nothing But Hope!

Enjoy the Journey

In the journey of your life,
You may find friendships that coil from new interests
As you confront your life
And you learn there are so many choices in life
And so many ways you can elevate.

Perhaps you'll find affection and warmth and care
Of someone special who's there
To lend you a helping hand a shoulder to cry on
To listen to you with heart

We may have friends who are encouraging of all that we do
And whatever decisions are made,
They’ll be the right there for you,
To help you to make your dream a success.

Sometimes you may find all the people
Whom you thought were friends
Are not as they seemed to be…
Your heart may ache…

As you travel through life, there are those times;
There you have to take the decisions,
When the choices are hard and solution seem thorny,
And all your dreams are shattered!
And you feel you can’t carry on

Still you have to let the life flow
In those situations what you can do is simply let go
And move on, gathering all the courage
And choose a direction that carries you toward a new dawn.

Think about the thrills yet to come
Let go of past, there could be adventures you never imagined
Just waiting around the next bend of your life
And wishes and dreams just about to come true
In ways you haven't yet realized.

Just remember first impressions are not always correct
And You must always have faith in people
And most importantly
You must always have faith in yourself!

Life is full of ups and downs.
Instead of thinking what you lost,
Think what you have and what you can achieve
And go for it... Life is there to live...
Live it to the fullest! Enjoy the Journey!